Playing with a Roman numeral watch: "I think it's X o'clock. Now it's I o'clock."
When he wants us to call him by a different name: "[Red Chief] is dead."
"Mommy, there's a ghost in my room. Please kill it."
Mr. Mordecai, before Red Chief prays: "What are you thankful for?"
Red Chief: nothing
Mr. Mordecai: "Are you thankful for Mommy?"
Red Chief: "No, I'm just thankful for the food."
(On a side note, he also occasionally calls me "Restaurant.")
"There's a button on Baby, and when you push it, she stops making noise."
People he pretends to be:
Bob the Builder
one of our Cub Scouts
a humane society officer
Roles he assigns to Tiger Lily:
Red Chief wearing his scout shirt and his bishop tie, showing off the table saw he made.